Mother’s
Day and Jesus’s Mother, Mary
This Sunday
is Mother’s Day, an important cultural observance though not a religious
one. Mother’s Day began in the 19th
century as part of the women’s movement that included Temperance and Women’s
Suffrage. The original idea behind was
that if the mothers of the world could come together in common cause, war as
they knew it then would cease.
Those hopes
proved unfounded, and the day found a new focus: the celebration of motherhood itself. For us Christians, of course, the major image
we have of motherhood is Jesus’s mother, Mary.
It’s
important to remember that Mary was both Jesus’s mother and his faithful
follower. She was present both at the
Bethlehem stable and the Calvary cross.
She saw the one she bore in all aspects of his life: precious child, precocious boy, adult teacher
and healer, prophet of love and justice, dying crucified Savior.
The English
essayist Francis Bacon once said, “The joys of parents are secret; and so are
their griefs and fears.” Anyone who has
ever read John Irving’s novel, The World
According to Garp, remembers the vivid scenes in which the hero chases
speeding cars through his neighborhood because of his protective anxiety about
children at play. The great joy of
parenthood is the way it bestows on you the gift of someone whom you may
unreservedly love. The fear of it is
that once you love this new person, you are also vulnerable and exposed in ways
you hadn’t been before. There is no
greater joy than being a parent. There
is nothing scarier, either.
“The joys
of parents are secret; and so are their griefs and fears.” Tradition tells us that Mary and Joseph were
exemplary parents. They nurtured and preserved Jesus from danger. They allowed him to grow into the loving,
generous, prophetic adult he became. Real parenting--be it by mothers or
fathers--consists in the balanced artistry of nurture and independence. Only as children are loved and supported and
embraced do they become secure enough to adventure out into adult freedom. Only as children are pushed out do they
become independent enough authentically to love their parents, and the world, in
return. The job of the parent is to put
herself or himself out of business. The
job of the parent is to prepare the child, and oneself, for a new kind of
relationship. It’s a great joy, and also
a great grief.
As we
celebrate Mother’s Day this year, let us use it as a day on which to honor all
those nurturers—our mothers, of course, but also our fathers, siblings,
friends, and mentors—who have helped us become the people we are. Parenting is a mixture of joy and grief. Mary has gone there before us. Our parents have too. May we have grace to love those in our charge
in ways that will both nurture and challenge them.
Gary Hall
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